Suing our Children...Joys of Parenthood

Parenthood. I am going to try not to make this not be super long. I am a single mom of a gross smelling, jerk face, loving, amazing, funny, and smart human being. He is 14...so yep mixed feelings.

Lets be real for a minute...we should sue our children! I think we would win!!! That is FALSE ADVERTISEMENT! They are so cute and smell so good (well most of the time), they don't talk back, they are absolutely adorable when you first bring them home. You are so scared that moment when they are like...yep take your child home. LIKE WHAT????? I'm NOT ready! In fact I decided mid push that I changed my mind...my rude ask heck mother told me it was too late!!! HOW dare she?!?!?!

I bring my child home, I am SO SCARED that I am going to BREAK that poor thing. That adorable little thing that just wants his mommy ALL the time and depends on me for EVERYTHING! WHAT THE HECK WAS I THINKING???? Let's be real...I could barely wipe my own a@$ most days!!! This is scary...that hospital was CRAZY to give me that boy!

He was so cute as a little toddler. He was mischievous and had so many little catch phrases like "I'll be right back" and "Be careful! Its really REALLY hot"! I may be partial but he was ADORABLE! Now I didn't have him for a lot of his life due to my crazy unforseen circumstances as you can see in my "My life in a nutshell" blog, but the moments we shared were great! He was adorable!!! Then...he turned (cue dramatic music) 13!!! This was the beginning of the end and why we should be allowed to sue our children. He started smelling like a dead man was under each of his armpits! He now talks back and has MAJOR attitude. I want to kill him half the time. But don't get me wrong. We are still close. No, I can't kiss him or hug him, or even look at him for that matter...but we have our moments. Going through this whole cancer thing that boy has been there for me. Don't get me wrong he is a total selfish brat most of the time. But when it come to his mom's health he will go to the store for me, cook for me, do whatever needs to be done (as long as he doesn't have to touch my underwear or dishes). So I may want to kill him half the time...and totally have the grounds to prove false advertisement...being his mom has been the BEST experience ever. I would do anything for that boy! I will protect him with my life...I can't breathe without him. BUT I do reserve the right to sue him.

#motherhood #parenthood #singlemom #parenting #falseadvertisement